Jul 29: State of My Year

Write up a mid-year “State of My Year” post.

It’s July 29th. It is my mother’s 64th birthday. And today, I will be doing a State of My Year address.

This year sucks ass. It actually started out great for me. My social calendar was thriving, I was doing OTs and earning more money than usual because of that. The first 3 months were amazing. I went on a trip every month from January to March. I went to see Jo Koy and visited Sagada, Banaue, and Buscalan in January. I revisited Boracay (after 6 years) and Romblon (after 2 months, LOL) in February. I visited Marinduque in March, but it got cut short due to the beginning of the quarantine. And then it all went downhill when COVID-19 became such a serious issue globally.

When Miss Rona got serious and started infecting millions and killing hundreds of thousands of people, we had to start making changes in our lives for our own safety. I had to cancel a flight to South Korea after all the trouble I went through for the visa, all my summer plans with my friends, and three concerts I have bought tickets for. I spent the whole summer in my bed. I have been working in my bedroom for months. I have been fighting the government on social media almost everyday. But like I said in a previous post, it’s not all bad. I get to spend more time with family and I have all this free time for different hobbies. But based on this paragraph alone, you could see that the bad outweighs the good. Obviously, Miss Rona is our biggest challenge for the year. There are so many other bad things that have been happening in the world and while that has always been present, I think it’s pretty clear that this year has been extra hard for everyone.

I also want to share something more personal. Some time in the last few months, I have decided to distance myself from someone who I feel like is not good for me. This was difficult because I’ve known this person for almost 3 years and have been speaking to this person almost everyday since I met him. Let’s just say he’s been a constant person in my everyday life for the past 3 years and he knows everything that’s going on in my life. I tell him everything, even the littlest, most annoying things. I even told him something from my childhood that I have never told anyone else in my life. There have been instances when I’ve tried letting this person go, but was not strong enough to do so. There was a time that I said to myself I wouldn’t know how my life would be without him and looking back, maybe I should have let go back then. I tried doing this a few times before, but I always get pulled back in. But I guess this time, I have just had enough and during this time wherein everyday has been such a struggle, I realized I really don’t need someone in my life who would judge me and jump to conclusions even before trying to understand what I truly meant. In all those years we’ve known each other, in all those times he told me, “I know you,” I thought that of all people, he would understand me best. But I was wrong. I guess I’m just very disappointed and I don’t want to keep feeling disappointed anymore. I am not mad at him. We are still friends in all social media platforms. I didn’t block him, he still views my IG stories, we just don’t talk anymore. I don’t know why I suddenly felt like sharing this on this post. It’s just a big change in my life I guess. It is my first time talking about this and probably the only time I will be doing it. I am okay and I am moving on.

Overall, I won’t mince my words and say that it has definitely been a terrible year so far. There have been good times and bad times, which is pretty standard, yes. But I would say, we all deserve better. I honestly think that it won’t get better anytime soon and now I’m just hoping for a much better 2021.

Inspired by this ebook, “365 Days of Writing Prompts” posted here.

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